Deal-breakers by Mina Lobo
“Hermes is so immature. He lacks a certain authority. While occasionally amusing, I find his ceaseless tricks and jests belie a rather spiteful sort of nature. I find it difficult to consider him marriageable when he is constantly in search of some frivolous amusement or other. He is handsome enough, in his way…” Persephone wrinkled her nose. “But, no. I want someone with whom I may share lighter moments, to be sure, but also someone who can turn his mind to more serious matters, someone who is capable of intelligent discourse.”
Athena thought again before suggesting, “Then what of Eros? He certainly is pleasing enough to look at and has all of those qualities you admire.”
“Yes, he is an excellent candidate,” Persephone said. “Unfortunately, I find him more suitable for the role of confidante than that of husband.” At Athena’s perplexed look, Persephone elaborated, “I regret to say that I feel no particular yearnings in his direction.”
“Ah!” the elder goddess exclaimed, in the tone of one who had finally come to the heart of a matter. “So you seek a male of authority, wisdom, depth and beauty, as well as one who can stoke your—ahem—internal fires. Well, that seems reasonable enough. Alas, I cannot think of a name to fit such a tall order.” But even as the Warrior Goddess uttered those words, her eyes widened and she became completely still.
The above excerpt comes from the second chapter of my fantasy romance, That Fatal Kiss, set in a mythical Greece. In this segment, Persephone's laying out for Athena what she wants in a mate. In this era, we call those "deal-breakers," right? These are the desirable qualities a person must possess before a more serious connection can be considered (or the undesirable qualities that will "break the deal" if they do exist). Poor Persephone hasn't had much luck finding a fella who fulfills her criteria, but Athena, the Goddess of Wisdom, may have thought up just the right guy...too bad the right guy went about hooking up with Persephone in totally the wrong way. (Totally.)
About a year ago, I thought about what my deal-breakers were and came up with a list of things (incomplete, probably) that I don't want in a partner. To wit, I'm not interested in tying the knot with a dude who:
- Likes hot weather
- Prefers Pepsi products to Coke
- Is a political extremist
- Is a religious extremist
- Prefers white wine to red
- Prefers cats to dogs
- Is cantankerous
- Doesn't enjoy the absurdities in/of life as I do
- Doesn't enjoy my eccentricities
- Is a sheep (follows the mob)
- Isn't naturally compassionate
- Is a racist, or any other bad -ist
- Thinks the poor and unfortunate brought their conditions upon themselves
How about y'all, what are your deal-breakers? An overabundance of facial hair? A penchant for wearing white off-season? Rudeness to waiters? (That last thing is massively uncool and, actually, will be added to my list.) Tell us your deal-breakers in the comments!
* * *
About the BookIn That Fatal Kiss, life-giving Persephone seeks a mate but the goddess' mother frustrates her plans. Then Hades, King of the Underworld, spirits Persephone away to rule with him below, as his bride. Yet, even as she awaits rescue, Persephone aches to be consumed by the fire in the dark lord's immortal soul.
About the Author
Mina Lobo writes dark and whimsical romances, dodges the slings and arrows of her outrageous college-aged son, and feels compelled to do things in threes. She digs comedic horror, alternative rock, and Belgian chocolates. (See?)
Visit Mina's Web site, Some Dark Romantic, from September 24 - 29, for your chance to win an e-book copy of That Fatal Kiss!